We all have our stories...don't we?

I dwell on the fact that "my situation" is so unique and so desperate....well it's not....and I know that. Everyone has "shit" going on their lives.... I'm not the only one with a lunatic mother (if I can even call her a "mother"...she always hated that term...it was always "mom"...neither fit for me), alcoholism, drug addicts, pornography, abuse....the list goes on)...I have to aspire. Life is really good for me....life is good for all of us, if we just take a look at what we have close at hand....forget all the other shit. Memories...I always take comfort in memories...I have so many that make me smile. I have children that make me smile. I have a roof over my head. I eat well. I was able to go out and buy new boots and make up. Hell...I'm going to Boston. Life is damn good...despite all the shit! We've got one shot at this life here on earth!..and whether you believe that we carry on or not...give it your all here...it can always be so much worse!! My mother is alive, despite the fact that to me...she's "dead". I know that whether or not I am loved by her...I am loved by others.... You have no idea what goes through my head....life can be shitty...but life is what we have...enjoy it...while you can....cuz you just never know.

On that note...I'm finally getting the other "lump" checked out...I'm not scared....I'm "almost" not scared about the flight to Boston either....I'm working out, I'm happy, I'm healty, I can't sleep...but that's okay....music is always my comfort..."don't forget to turn out the light"......................