Friday, January 27, 2012

The nasty disease got a good one....

I have been on an emotional roller-coaster today.....tears flow at a drop of a....well, pretty much anything.

A young mother of 39 (two boys 7 and 3) who had chemo with me on a few occasions passed away on Wednesday.  I got to know her and I can honestly say that I'm devastated....  She fought a hell of a fight and got through another Christmas but ended up succumbing this past Wednesday.  May she rest in peace and may her family know what an incredible inspiration she was to everyone that knew her!!!

I'm just at a loss today....I guess reality hit again....I've had it easy, but I also know that things can change in an instant.  I'm fighting this fucking disease myself and so when I get strange looks from people when I tell them the procedures I'm going through to stay healthy....well....*phhht*.

I've made too many "cancer friends" through this....and that's not to say that I don't want them to be my's just I wish we didn't share this particular "disease"...but I love them all....and that's what's so hard.....really...honestly....we're just living on borrowed time....  Sure some of us might get 10 years, maybe 20 and maybe even 30....but at 44....that's just not enough.  I'll take what I can get and I'll make the most of it....but I will also cry for those that don't get that "extra time".

And with that.....God rest Mrs. Jackie put up a hell of a fight....may your children always know what a brave and strong person you were!!!


Deanna said...

I am sorry that you have have to make friends with people that are leaving this world much too soon.

It is so unjust.

Them KNOWING YOU was one of the best things that happened to them on their journey.

Erik said...

Pretty awful that a mother so young and with young kids passes on. So sad for them. Mostly for the 3 year old who will probably only have impressions and photos and videos to remember his mother by.

But it can also serve as a stark and painful reminder that we are all on a clock that is counting down from the moment we take our first breath. Our lives are but an instant and it is our duty to try to make the very most of the time we do have before that clock hits zero.

Be well, never forget to let your family know how much you love them (I know you do tell them!) and you can honor Jackie's memory by living your life to the fullest extent possible.

Jen said...

How awful. I am glad that you two got to meet though. She obviously left an impression upon you. I like what Erik said, about living your life to the fullest is the best way to honor her.