Getting through the days...

 I've been asked.....do you write down your thoughts?

Well, I tried to, I did....I probably should do more so.  

So many thoughts go through my head...some scare me, some worry me, some make me so sad and some are very very happy.   For the last week things have been good here.  I feel overwhelmed with work so the fact that my son is on an emotional, natural "high" comforts me.  We will see how long that lasts before he succumbs to another relapse...I pray that that never happens but right now I am not holding my breath.  There is nothing harder than having a child with an addictive personality.  And when I say he has "addictions", it is the addiction of the moment...could be meth, could be coke, could alcohol, could be the forest.

Three kids all raised the exact same.  No broken marriage.  All loved the same.  One is a professional engineer.  One is a happy, well talented barista/certified pastry chef and one....struggles day to day.

It's strange not to worry about 2 of your 3 kids and yet all your strength be spent on the last one, the first born.

Life is strange like that.