I don't think I can take another punch to the gutt

.....so today I'm working away trying to get some entries done when I hear the door-bell...."ahhh Grandpa will get it....." and he does.  Next thing I hear...."hello?...hello?"  I stop what I'm doing and open my office door...."hey ... how are you doing?...what are you doing here?"

"Well I got my test results back"....."colonoscopy"

I started to cry...I knew right away....her father died of colon cancer 2 years ago.

My dear friend was diagnosed with colon cancer a week ago....she's younger than I, has two younger children 12/7....this one has hit me really really hard.  To boot my markers have gone up....so it's not helping.  I'm so sick and tired of this fucking disease...there's no justice when it comes to cancer.  It sees that all my friends now have the disease....I'm done with this shit....just want to live a life without it...not possible...I know.

So I make the best of it and I tell my friends to do the same...easier said than done.  Fucking disease robs us of our dignity, humility and our body parts....and sadly...at times our lives....

I'm not giving up...and I'm going to make damn well sure that those around me don't as well.....

Now if only I could get my husband to get and get his nads checked!!!!